Love Through a Labyrinth

28 Sep 2024 4 Comments

by Dr. Tricia Wolanin in Uncategorized Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

“The unicursal path of the labyrinth is what differentiates it and sets it apart as a spiritual tool. The labyrinth does not engage our thinking minds. It invites our intuitive, pattern-seeking, symbolic mind to come forth. It presents us with only one, but profound, choice. To enter a labyrinth is to choose to walk a spiritual path.” 
― Dr. Lauren Artress

            Labyrinths often are confused with mazes.  At a quick glance, they appear similar.  Oftentimes a circular journey that appears to trick us as we walk towards the center.  Yet there is one differences.  Mazes have multiple options one can talk, a small form of choose your own adventure, filled with false pathways and dead-ends.  But labyrinths do not trick us, there is only one way in and out. 

            Over the years, I’ve wandered through numerous labyrinths, but inside churches, buildings, and in gardens and retreat centers.  Yet, the experience at Chartres Cathedral was profound.  I had heard once that the labyrinths, particularly in France during the medieval times served as a metaphorical pilgrimage people could take if they did not have the time or physical strength to take the 500 plus mile walk via Camino de Santiago. This contemplative practice offered a piece of the reflection that could occur. 

            I was reminded that a pilgrimage begins with intention, often when one leaves the home. Last week, as we waited at Gare Montparnesse for our train track to be displayed to Chartres, we witnessed a staff member arguing with her boss.  He didn’t seem to be understanding her as her voice elevated, at one point she screamed and hit the floor.  Was it a panic attack, stress induced stress or a dramatic act?  We couldn’t tell as a handsome passenger who also was a doctor, offered his help.  As the fainting woman was sent away in a mini ambulance golf cart, I wondered had the pilgrimage begun. Each component played a part in the day: the heavy bags we carried, a miscommunication with the uber driver, the short but steep distance we walked from the train station to the hotel?  A line of police vans drove by and small tents were getting set up.  I couldn’t help but wonder what type of celebration was occurring or who was here.  We queried our receptionist, who stated simply that someone important was in town. Thoughts immediately went to political importance.  When I inquired if it was the president, she nodded her head, not wanting to verbally share who was here but not denying it either.

And so the pilgrimage really did begun. Each persona we met with during the day served as an archetype for the journey: the victim, the doctor, the police, the staff, and the president.   We were prompt to arrive at Chartres Cathedral, as we were aware the labyrinth is only open for several hours on Fridays during some parts of the year. But as we walked to the Cathedral, we noticed crowds of students gathered outside and inside.  Was it a massive field trip or something else?  I later learned it was a photo op with President Macron.  We were so in the zone of the moment that we didn’t seem to absorb he was in the Cathedral the same time as us.  The labyrinth appeared before us, uncovered from the chairs that usually sit on top of it. I was curious how this labyrinth experience would compare to others I have done in the world. 

One is to think of an intention as you enter a labyrinth. And so I did.  As I meandered from one side of it to the other I reflected on this intention.  Volunteers guarded the labyrinth, from tourists who stumbled unknowingly onto the labyrinth.  They ensured that all who would grace the space offered their respect to what lay underneath them.  If they were not going to walk it appropriately, they would have to leave the labyrinth and walk around the perimeter. The protector archetype was present, as was the fool, and the student.  And as I walked the labyrinth, I would repeat my mantra. Pause.  Repeat.  Many of us were spread out, but as we entered the final stretch of the labyrinth, there was a bit of a human traffic jam.  I wondered if I would feel frustrated with so many people there. Were people taking it seriously or was it just another quick tourist photo op?

But something shifted and changed.  I dropped into this sentimental place observing my fellow pilgrims. And then I couldn’t stop crying for the beauty of the moment.  This entire day was a metaphor of life.  All the characters and interactions, and in the symbolism of this walk we were each headed for a moment in the center.  The Chartres labyrinth is special in there are 6 petals in the center, for this particular walk, unspoken rules were created were our specific group.  We were all strangers from different parts of the world momentarily gathered to embark on this contemplative tradition.  As we walked into the entryway to the center, each of us would step to the left, as the person in the center stepped out.  Some people had their hands to their hearts, bellies, both, or even palms open, ready to receive.  As the person stood in the center, they faced the altar and infamous stained glass windows.  It was as if it was there moment to shine, receive our quiet intentions and prayers, before stepping out. I couldn’t help but compare this specific part to one’s death, offerings, acknowledgement and prayers are made for a moment in time in one’s honor before you step out of the labyrinth.

Each time you walk the labyrinth it’s different but this specific moment will be etched in my mind.  It served as a powerful reminder of meeting each part of ourselves on the journey of life. And having a moment of grace before one steps out of their path on earth. What are your stepping into? What are you leaving behind?

            And so I challenge you to find a local labyrinth, make one, engage in a finger labyrinth and notice what metaphors arise on the journey.

Awe and Wonder

05 Jun 2024 Leave a comment

by Dr. Tricia Wolanin in Uncategorized Tags: , , , , , , , ,

“He who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead; his eyes are closed.”- Albert Einstein

This past weekend I went to an Awe & Wonder Retreat, 3 days 2 nights retreat to Esalen, led by Dacher Keltner.  I didn’t know what I was getting into when I signed up, I simply wanted to go to Esalen.  Every retreat listed seemed to be filled with inspiration, as Esalen’s focus has been on the intersection on philosophy, spirituality, and psychology.  My friend Gretchen told me the other day that one of her life goals is to go to Esalen, and that there are two things that stir her with passion and excitement in this world: love and the programs at Esalen.  I could not agree more.  Yet, I chose the right program to attend, it was exactly what my soul needed at this moment in time. 

Dacher shared the 8 aspects of wonder which include: Mystical Experience/Spirituality, Moral Beauty (Kindness and Courage we witness in others), Visual Design, Music, Collective Effervescence (what we experience in concerts or sporting events), Life and Death, Nature, Big Ideas. Through focusing on awe and wonder several times a week, we can decrease loneliness, depression, and increase a sense of gratitude.  Although Dacher is a social psychologist, that has studied happiness, has consulted with Pixar for the films Inside Out and Soul, and helped create the emojis for Facebook, he recently pivoted his work toward the concepts of Awe and Wonder. He chose to do this after his brother Rolf died of colon cancer.  There was so much grief there as he reflected the totality of the experiences around the world together over decades, but also with this was a sense of awe for the life cycle.  He knew he could emerge from this grief from studying and focusing on awe. 

Throughout the workshop we learned about the research of Awe and Wonder, completed experiential exercises collectively or in small groups, and processed what was arising internally through reflective writing exercises and contemplation.  The group that consisted of 33 people of all different ages cried together, smiled, laughed, and shared about experiences of bliss, wonder, and grief.  The concept of awe and wonder seemed so simple, this is something we used to relish in as children, and at times when we are mindful.  Yet it is so poignant.  Over the past fifteen years, I have a daily practice of gratitude, but I admit at times it can get stale.  Adding one reflection of what brought me wonder could enrich this each night.  I realize that my Instagram posts (amodernpilgrimage) is to pivot and remind others of the sacred places in the world, sacred moments, and the sacredness in oneself also point to the sense of awe and wonder.

On the 6 ½ hour drive up to Esalen, we listened to the entire soundtrack of Hamilton.  My friend had never heard of it, and has not been exposed to many musicals in her life.  As I drove up the 101 North, I cried at parts of the songs that always seem to touch me.  That musicals seems to express the vastness of emotions we have and the rawness of the human experience.  This is why I love this creation so much, and I realized it was a wonderful introduction to the Awe and Wonder weekend.  Oftentimes, when I am so moved by something, whether this is a piece of art, writing, song, interaction with a stranger, or a beautiful landscape I want to share this.  I yearn for this peak emotion of Awe, which is easily accessible to us. 

For the research of the book, the following question was asked to thousands of people from nearly 30 countries :

What is an experience of awe that you have had, when you encountered a vast mystery that transcends your understanding of the world?

From this, the 8 wonders of life were created.  And so I encourage you today to reflect on this question, share this question with a friend, acquaintance or even a stranger.  Let it land on you and allow yourself to linger on the beauty of reflection and conversation.

Retreats

03 Jun 2024 Leave a comment

by Dr. Tricia Wolanin in Uncategorized Tags: , , , ,

Somehow I have learned to feel at home on a retreat, regardless of the location. I know how it works.  There is a sense of familiarity in that you are going to be asked to connect with the collective present, with oneself, and hopefully nature.  Space will be available for silence and processing, after being pushed out of your comfort box.  Opportunities for reflection walks and moments alone journaling are abundant.

Limited time is given to post on social media or check your emails. Your daily busy routines are interrupted by a long pause.  One slows down and cannot escape oneself, and all the moments for awe and wonder arise.  It doesn’t matter where the retreat setting is:    on a mountain top in the chill rich autumn months, on the beach on a hot summer day, next to the ocean in a natural spring bath during the fluctuating weather of spring.  If you listen, sacredness is present.

But even though I know the structure of what may arise at a retreat, there’s always some element of surprise. There is a new piece of information I hear that I cannot wait to share with a loved one, or something that is unravelled that you discover about yourself. Or the essence of the land becomes embedded in your bones, and there is a vow to return to this exact healing place again.

Retreats nourish our bodies, souls, and minds. They cradle our overworked bodies, while providing a nook to sleep in, and satiate your belly with delicious healthy cuisine.  And somehow for a moment, we feel satisfied with what is in the human experience.  The joys we celebrate, sorrows we grieve, mysteries that unfold, and the sublime feeling that lingers.

Like the ocean waves that hit the rocks and sway back to source, there is a natural rhythm present, a push and pull that’s gravitational.  Nothing shall be feared if one surrenders to the creative process that one is immersed in.  Retreats call us back to ourselves.  That inner self that is unique and yet the same as everyone else.  Perhaps this is what Jospeh Campbell meant when he said “Follow Your Bliss,” as he returned to the Esalen retreat center annually for his birthday.  Someone who studied mythology and cultures from around the world when travel was limited and met with some of the greatest minds and artists of his time, chose to return to a retreat center in Big Sur California each year to honor his birth.

Magic happens at retreat centers that is ineffable, and it is my hope you grant yourself this gift. Perhaps it will be once, but I have a feeling if you are moved as much as Joseph Campbell and I, you will be called to return annually to come home to yourself.

Comfort in Coffee

21 Oct 2023 Leave a comment

by Dr. Tricia Wolanin in Uncategorized Tags: , , , ,

“I would rather own a little and see the world than own the world and see a little of it.” ~ Alexander Sattler

            Today I leave for a one week long silent retreat. Although I am flying from Spain to Italy, there’s no stress. The bus ride to the airport and security check in was easy, minimal people and lines. There is beauty in travelling in your city’s down season.  I am not fluent in Spanish or Italian, but travelling between these countries is uncomplicated.  Currently I am living in Spain, and Italy I have been to nearly fifteen times. It feels as if it is a second home, and therefore my parasympathetic nervous system is in activation.  

            One has to mentally prepare for a silent retreat.  The planner and I Pad were left at home.  In addition, to forewarning others they will not be hearing back from you anytime soon (friends, family, jobs, landlords, etc), you must also forewarn yourself. No speaking, communicating, Netflix online scrolling, google searching, social media posting, or news reading. It sounds lovely right? But you have to be prepared.

            I will be at the Mandali Retreat Center, literally among the clouds, near the Alps.  Because this is my fourth time at this retreat center and with teachers I have studied with for years, I can relax.  My body knows it will be taken care of.  From the beautiful landscape I will be surrounded by, to the vegetarian homemade food I will eat, teas available, or the pool and jacuzzi at my convenience- I know I can relax.  My only job for one week is to be present.  There are no meetings to be had, emails to respond to, or expectations that can be made of me. As I write this, I am truly grateful, and realize this is pure luxury. 

            As I sit in the airport, and sip my coffee, there’s even more comfort.  Costa Coffee is a British coffee chain.  It once was my favorite, when I lived there, and now it’s an infrequent treat that I see on rare occasions. It’s as if I am sipping onto warm memories. 

            Travelling can be stressful, as there are so many components involved, as one prepares for a trip.  All must line up, from transportation, to who will dog sit or house sit, packing, lines to wait in, and everything in between.  Being able to have the opportunity to feel relaxed and rested amidst the height of travel offers that gentle but firm support one needs to voyage. 

A Meditative Train Ride

11 Oct 2023 Leave a comment

by Dr. Tricia Wolanin in Uncategorized Tags: , , , ,

This morning I took the train from Malaga to Madrid.  It was a 750 am train with one stop in Cordoba.  The twenty-three minute walk to the train station from my home was in complete darkness on this mid-October morning.  After getting through a brief security screening and check-in, I finally arrived at my seat on the air conditioned train.  I’ve always enjoyed train rides, due to the tranquility and distance one travels without having to be the one to drive. It’s a simple journey, different than the stress one can feel when taking a trip via airports. 

As our train left the station, darkness still surrounded us.  I took the time to journal and check emails.  But as we travelled through the Andalucian landscape, there were glimmers that the sun was slowly waking up.  Eventually, I caught a glimpse of it as it peaked out over the countryside, and all of a sudden it burst out.  And I couldn’t help but be mesmerized by the beauty of this moment.  Sunrises occur daily, but it’s so infrequent that I actually get to see them.  I feel appreciative that I was able to witness this.  I didn’t have time to properly do a full on meditation this morning, but I realized this served as my meditation.  

One doesn’t need to be in a lotus position to seek a higher state.  All that is needed is awareness and presence to all of your five senses.  The moment was reminding me of the sacredness of life that is available to us all, whenever we are willing to witness it. 

Next time you have the opportunity to opt for a train ride, take it.  In Europe, train rides are a standard way to travel.  But as Americans, we prefer to drive or fly due to comfort and a longing for immediate gratification.  Allow yourself the luxury of lingering on a train, without having to worry about being the driver, traffic, being rushed, or anything outside of witnessing what is outside your window. 

From Stress To Happiness

17 Nov 2022 Leave a comment

by Dr. Tricia Wolanin in Uncategorized Tags: , , ,

“If you don’t trust life, the worst has already happened.”-Brother David, Benedictine Monk on Stress to Happiness Documentary

Yesterday I felt guided to watch a documentary on Netflix entitled Stress to Happiness.  The film pulled me in with the initial song by Paz that played in the background “I Am,” which is on my beloved Puzo’s favorite playlist.  It was filmed in Argentina and follows Alejandro, a 39 year old husband, father, and filmmaker who has had increasing amounts of stress. He is seeking mentorship and guidance from Tibetan Buddhist Matthieu Ricard, who has been named the happiest man on earth.  He earned this title after he was part of a 12 year neuroscientific study that looked on meditation and compassion.  

The one hour documentary was simple.  A brief description of the struggle Alejandro is facing, and his wife trying to support him on his journey of seeking a calmer state.  They host Matthieu Ricard as he travels their home country, and head to Patagonia and Mount Fitz Roy.  As they film and take Matthieu around, they pick his brain as to how to achieve this calmer state during these times.  

When they are in a small cabin by Mount Fitz Roy, they engage in a loving kindness meditation. Metta, or loving kindness meditations, encourage us to send loving thoughts to ourselves, loved ones, acquaintances, those we dislike, and the larger world.  What I found fascinating as Matthieu offered the meditation, the audience can meditate as well.  Background images of a fireplace is shown or a beautiful snow capped mountaintop. 

The film served as a beautiful reminder to focus on what matters in one’s life and to not get caught up on our attachments to things, situations, or people.  This is a prominent teaching in Buddhism, attachment is the root of all suffering.  There were numerous questions that Alejandro asked, and although not all were answered, what arose seemed to be the importance of reflecting on this.  

Why am I stressed? What is meditation and what is it for? How to get out of anxiety? How to get out of fear? What does neuroscience have to say about it? What is the purpose of life? How do we develop a life of purpose? How do we build trust? What is the best way to make use of our life? And what are the questions that really make sense to ask ourselves?

What seems most important is to sit with the following question, which poet Mary Oliver asks in her poem The Summer Day
 Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?

Adjustments to Meditation

03 Jul 2022 Leave a comment

by Dr. Tricia Wolanin in Uncategorized Tags: , , 

        My mother is visiting for 10 days, which is lovely.  BUT whenever I have a visitor, or whenever I travel, my morning spiritual routine must shift.  I have grown accustomed to living alone and making my morning sacred :  journaling (morning pages), gratitude, breathwork, meditation, yoga, spiritual texts.  But now it has to shift, my mom even said this morning « no time for yoga when I’m here. »  and so I must improvise.  My meditation shifts to the evening, or I am reminded that walking my dogs is a walking moving meditation.  This is what it must be.  The trip is time limited, and just because for several days it has to be altered, it doesn’t mean I must lose the essence of the practice .  


      Years ago, this was the problem with my meditation practice.  I became attached to what it had to look like.  I only meditated using one particular method, and if it did not fit that mold, then I viewed it as if I had  failed at meditation for the day.  But over the years, I’ve learned to have more self compassion for myself.  I’ve learned to be flexible, and to include other aspects of life into my meditation.
       It’s easy in some ways to live a spiritual life on your own, or while you are on a meditation retreat.  But what about when you get thrown into the everyday world ?  Things must shift, and so it has.  And this is okay.
       We can still live with intention, even if our days are jolted a bit.   We can appreciate it for what it is versus being irritated it does not look a particular way.  We can turn towards the beings that are in our atmosphere and learn to mold our spiritual life to wave like strands of long grass in the wind.  Flexibility is key to our daily lives, even with our morning discipline.