It Only Takes A Smile

Seven days and nights in Miami has been restorative for my inner 8 year old, who is squeezing in the last summer moments of sun, laps in the outdoor pool, and dips into the ocean.  It has taken several days for my body and mind to drop into a pure relaxed state, remove the busy-ness of work and responsibilities.  My nighttime dreams begin to deepen, and I can recall and interpret them.   

Midway through my trip, as I was swimming in the ocean, completing a lap, I saw there was a commotion among my fellow travellers.  I had to pause to explore what it was about.  “It’s a dolphin!” one of them yelled.  “See the fin.”  I searched and grabbed a peak of the dolphin in a distance.  These two sisters began talking to me, telling their story.  “You see it’s my birthday today, and I asked God for a sign.  Show me a dolphin for my birthday, and here it is.  God is real.  God is here.”  They went on to discuss that they were only in Miami for 24 hours.  It was the one sister’s birthday, who flew in from Michigan.  The other sister flew from NYC, and went on to share “you have to do these things for people you love.  Even though it’s only 24 hours, these things matter.”  These sisters exclaimed, “We have been manifesting everything on this trip.”  They shared that if you are a good person, you will attract good people and experiences.  They were talking my language.  This is how I always live my life, and I was happy to witness this experience with them.  It was a momentary spiritual experience that was shared among strangers, and I appreciated this.   

I automatically told this story to my friend Gretchen, who was travelling with me.  Our days slowly passed by, eventually we arrived at our last day.  Gretchen mentioned to me, while we woke up “We only have 24 hours in Miami, we are going to manifest everything!”  She was not saying this to poke fun at these strangers, but to learn from them.  You can make the most out of everyday.  Instead of looking at your remaining hours with sadness and disappointment, you can reframe it as you have an abundance of one day, in which anything is possible.  All can be manifested!

What will manifest in your life in the next 24 hours? 

Walking the streets of the cities you used to live and frequent, is a comforting and humbling process.  I’m currently on a several week trip in the United States stopping in numerous cities, but I’ve briefly paused in New York City.  I lived in New York for two years, but never felt it was long enough to be a New Yorker.  Perhaps it’s because the vastness this area holds.  It envelops you, and two years is not long enough to properly know a city like this.  All I feel like I could properly know was a two block radius, which included my favorite Thai takeout shop, Greek restaurant, pizzeria, and local café.  Although I didn’t feel it ever was truly my neighborhood, I can have pride for my time I spent on Grand Street in Williamsburg and my pocket of warmth when I lived in Hell’s Kitchen on 49^th between 9^th and 10^th.  

As I watch young twenty-somethings on the subway, I look at them with curiosity and hope.  I wonder if I gaze long enough if I will spot hints of the old me in them, the one that lived here fourteen years ago.  I watch the locals who navigate the land promptly, smartly, and with determination.  Does that me still exist?  Most of the time their eyes are stuck to their phones, texting, scrolling, or watching shows on their commutes.  In the close quarters of a subway car, with limited personal space, their mental focus zones to the screen in front of them.   Times have changed since I lived here, but perhaps this is why I didn’t fit in.

Part of me yearned to slow down when I walked.  I wanted to spend more time in the parks than in the high rises or gritty hipster streets.  What pulled me to New York when I was younger was the artistic life I longed for, but I had to work double hard to survive and pay rent when I was here. There was minimal time that existed for my creativity.  Who I wanted to be and who I was couldn’t mesh while I existed here.  But each time I come back, I can appreciate how the city twists and molds to the residents that breathe here at this time.  There’s beauty in the malleability, which simultaneously can hold history, maybe even a momentary imprint of me.