Hidden Acts of Kindness

I am lounging in Caje Café in Santa Barbara, a Spanish style coffee shop that sits across the Alrington Theater.  It’s happenstance that I’m here during the Santa Barbara Film Festival in front of a premiere.  People are lined up to see the stars walk down the red carpet before entering the theater. 

The café drew me in not because of it’s proximity to this event but because of the beauty of the courtyard.  After leaving Andalucia in December, I was missing the outdoor beauty of Spanish life, and longed to be close to a beautiful fountain and greenery.  There were young college students at the café, in addition to yuppies, dog owners, and fellow book lovers who sprawled out in the sun and read their next chapter.  There was also a man who appeared to be struggling with mental health issues, potentially homeless, walking up to various customers muttering to himself, before he was kicked out. 

I sat in the outdoor café and wrote, once in awhile peaking on what was going on around me.  The music was quiet and chill, it was a simple Sunday afternoon.  But then I heard loud screams coming from the street. Me along with many of the customers stepped out of the café’s white entrance to sneak a peak.  The main star arrived.  Billie Eilish’s van pulled up and she was about to enter the festival. The screams were loud, fans stood on their tip toes to see above the crowd to get a view above other fans who were holding up her most recent record.  She briefly stopped to shake fans’ hands and was interviewed by the press before heading into the theater.

 I went back into the café, whose background music was promptly changed from soft mellow tunes to a loud Billie Eilish song.  As I walked in, so did the man with mental health issues.  He was running behind the screaming crowd and proceeded to run back into the café, making fellow patrons squeamish.  A woman came up to him, and asked what was wrong.  I wasn’t close enough to hear the words he was muttering on repeat.  He was distraught and upset.  She held his hand and slowed down her breathing. Gentle loud exhales to decrease his nervous system, as she did this she repeated to him “you are safe.”  She continued to check what he needed at that moment, and offered to get him water as he sat down.  The fellow staff member who kicked him out minutes earlier, came by to check. 

This female courageous customer was handling the situation.  She was calming this stranger down, when everyone else backed away.  He was shaken by the loud screams for Billie Eilish and was unaware of what was going on. 

As I watch this all unfold, I thought of the irony of the situation.  This woman was the real rock star here.  Yes, artists and musicians help express our emotions and get us through difficult times in our lives through their creative works.  Everyone surrounded the theater to welcome her entrance to the event.  But at a café across the street, a woman was in the everyday trenches, offering a moment of tangible calm support to a stranger that was viewed by others as untouchable. She was not paid for this act, and nobody else said anything to her for this to be recognized as profound and strong. 

I offered her one of these Puzo Bella cards (which you may have received, which is why you may be reading this blog).  I wanted to tell her I noticed her and wanted to thank her for helping a stranger.  For some reason as I did this, I wanted to cry.  In that moment, she had this superhero strength of compassion of a saint.  And I wanted her to know it was seen and appreciated.  There’s so much to be seen and admired in this world, and it’s not only things that are of material wealth.  It’s these everyday moments that are full of rich individuals, simply helping a stranger.

1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. John Wolanin
    Feb 12, 2024 @ 20:40:05

    Amazing story of the real rock stars in life.

    Reply

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