La La Lampedusa

30 Jul 2023 Leave a comment

by Dr. Tricia Wolanin in Uncategorized Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

And I could finally let out a sigh.

It was as if I ate a large meal, and could unbutton the first part of my jeans and breathe again.

This is what I felt when I walked the streets of Lampedusa.  It was a hectic busy 24 hours flying from Malaga to Naples, going to Pompeii, and flying to Lampedusa. The day was filled with a bit of anxiety, travel stress, and tons of stress.  I think my body was on guard and tense due to my strict timelines, the heat, and the awareness of the fact that I could not get too comfortable because I would have to move to the next location.  I had not arrived yet.  But now walking the quiet “main street” of town, I could relax.  I didn’t even need to go to the beach yet to feel the chill vibes. 

There was a tranquility here. The restaurants placed chairs on the center of the road and closed off the street for the night to begin.  Store workers sat in plastic chairs as tourists walked by.  Elderly locals looked over their balconies to observe the newest people to visit their island.  These photos capture peaceful moments in this Italian Island, which was once considered a Tunisian territory.

It’s a place I don’t know much about.  As I tried to youtube video clips, I couldn’t find much. I know Italians vacation here for their summer holidays.  But it’s also more well known for something else.  When I told a French guy I was coming here, he said “Lampedusa the place where all the migrants go?”  This is true, why most people are aware of this area is it is the location that many refugees try to escape to.  It’s a gateway to Europe, people from various parts of Africa voyage to Tunisia.  And from there the expedition continues.  As you are aware, not many people make it. 

This past spring, I decided to set the goal of joining TCC (Travel Century Club), to be part of this, I must visit 100 territories, and I want to do this before I turn 50.  Since I want to do this, and was flying to Naples already, why not go to Lampedusa? I also will San Marino, while I am at it.  So this is what I am doing.  Lampedusa marks the 65th territory I have visited. 

 I am staying in Lampedusa for five nights, and originally I thought this was excessive.  The island is only 7 miles long and 2 miles wide.  Would I go crazy, could I fly to Tunisia and check off another territory?  But now that I am here, my soul is grateful for what has been planned out before me.  

I have time to wind down, write, read, and catch up with myself.  The slow pace of the locals and the fact that there are minimal tours here, allows me to wander or simply swim in the sea.  I could allow myself to simply be, and I wasn’t aware that this is what I was longing for.  Even though I am not currently working, I was attending Spanish classes for one month, and was in the midst of applying to jobs in America and going through loads of interviews.  I also am taking a mythology class, which I love and was deep in reading the suggested literature.  So overall, I was “busy.”  It was a busy-ness of choice yes, and not of necessity, but it was still busy. 

As I walk the main street, I note the muted spring colors. Things are not as vibrant as the electricity in hues of Miami or the blue white tranquility of Santorini.  There’s a sense of humbleness, in the toned down colors of the building.  They are not trying to be anything spectacular or Instagram worthy, they just are.  In some ways this a beach Mediterranean island which would be featured in a Wes Anderson film.  There are characters that exist here: in the locals that never left the island, the refugees that have fled here, and the vacationers they serve.  I’m not sure what the storyline is yet, and maybe it would be a film of an everyday life on this quiet picturesque place, which has yet to been bombarded by excessive crowds.  

The days pass, and I note the same people on the street.  They notice me and wave.  There’s the older sailor man who sails spices, the family who opened a new restaurant serving fresh fish burgers, the Thai and Italian family selling gorgeous clothes, and the local elderly couple who probably own the hotel I am staying in who sit on the couch every afternoon to watch the guests.  

The slow pace has allowed me to linger.  I walked throughout much of the bottom half of the island, swam in numerous seas, laid on rocks in the style of Barbarella, and had time to write.  I appreciate that Lampedusa hasn’t gotten all the acclaim yet.  It’s as if I stepped back in time, and could find not just another culture but a more relaxed version of myself I have lost. 

All Part of the Journey

26 Jul 2023 Leave a comment

by Dr. Tricia Wolanin in Uncategorized Tags: , , , ,

“Stuff your eyes with wonder, live as if you’d drop dead in ten seconds. See the world. It’s more fantastic than any dream made or paid for in factories.” ~ Ray Bradbury

            I am about to embark on a pilgrimage for the Black Madonna in the Amalfi Coast.  This begins next week, but I thought I would embark on my trip a little earlier.  I flew into Naples and before catching a flight the next day to another city, I had some free time in the morning.  I squeezed in Pompeii.  I had been to Naples previously with my ex-husband who is Italian American.  Although we loved Italy, Naples wasn’t our favorite.  All I remember was grabbing pizza and staying in our hotel.  We didn’t want to venture onto the streets that appeared impoverished, full of trash, homeless, mafia, and crime.  Naples was a stopover on our way to go to the Amalfi Coast.  For this trip, I had originally planned the same itinerary.  Pizza and staying in my air conditioned hotel room.  

            I am a world solo traveller, and pride myself in this.  But I have to admit before going to Naples I had some anxiety.  This was because I had to leave my 14 year old chug Bella again.  I was grateful she was going to stay with friends, but their plans were delayed and to sort it out I had to rely on another friend to offer keys to my apartment and greet them.  I left four page instructions and stick it notes around the house to direct guide and answer any questions.  Yes, I may be an overprotective dog mom but wanted to offer the most for my pet and my friends who would be staying in my place.  Maybe the guilt for leaving was excessive, after my 15 year English Bulldog died last year the day after I returned from a trip.  But Bella is healthy and a wonderful host.  (Thank you in advance Mayra, Dave, and Lucy for helping with this!)

            Another worry that crept in was the potential crime that Naples had, was I going to stand out like a tourist and be targeted?  I was so lucky that an acquaintance Veronika was on my flight from Malaga to Naples.  I was staying close to the train station, and she said there was a lot of crime there.  Her warning for me was to watch my belongings because I had excess stuff.  I was travelling for 2 ½ weeks, and had only a carry on and a bag.  She was going to be in Italy for a month, and had only one backpack.  She even thought this was too much for her.  Veronika also encouraged me to “look both ways when crossing the street here, then look again.”  She had lived in the region before.  Although I am a world traveller, I was humble enough to welcome the advice.  All was welcome and needed.   She also was able to guide me to my hotel, as my phone and the new sim card was not currently working in the country. 

            Although I had an easy chill night upon arrival, after grabbing a pizza (in the city that invented pizza), I opted to push the boundaries and go to Pompeii in my spare morning hours the next day.   I was so grateful I did, to observe with wonder the vastness of this city, the impact of destruction, and the remnants that highlight the luxury of past residents.  But it was hot!  July in Southern Italy is full of intense sun and heat, but I was prepared with my layers of sunblock, sunglasses, a hat, loads of water, and an abanico.  

            The entire day I was dripping with sweat, as one can witness in this photo.  It looks like I am glistening.  It started off to me glistening and transitioned to a ghastly site.  I was living in my sweat throughout my exploration of the grounds of Pompeii, the ride back to Naples in a non-air conditioned crowded train, walk to my hotel and the bus stop.  As I stood on the bus ride to the airport, crammed next to other travellers, sweat dripped into my eyes.  I was dripping with sweat on every part of my body.  It seemed as if others were not quite as soaked as I was, but they probably didn’t rush through Pompeii.  I expected to be this hot and disgusting when walking the Camino and wearing hiking gear, but travelling in a city I wasn’t prepared for that.  I was glad I was not travelling with anyone, because I am sure we would have been irritable and complaining. I stayed silent and focused on the current task at hand.  

            There was a mantra I repeated to myself throughout the day “this is part of the journey.”  This week leading up to the pilgrimage, was the pilgrimage.  The pilgrimage does not begin when I meet with the group, it began when I left my home.  The insanity of Naples, the ups and downs, the fears, the joys, the assistance from friends, the sweat, the delicious pizza, the observation of gorgeous antiquities or sacred geometry floors was all part of it. 

            Pilgrimage and some forms of travel are not for the faint of heart.  It requires grit and persistence to embark on such a thing.  To be a tourist, is to glide from one air conditioned vehicle to another, stay in an air conditioned hotel, be escorted to safe locations, skip the ugly façade of cities, minimize walking and public transportation, have tasty elaborate meals, and witness only the beauty of cities.  This is what you pay for.  It’s a luxury and it is why retirees vacation like this.  They deserve it.  There is nothing wrong with this, and at a certain age I would only want to walk through the world in this way.  But for now, I am reasonably young, healthy, and have an overall positive mindset.  I can handle the fluctuations of a journey.  I know the struggles can only enrich the story.  And so far there have been no “bad” parts, just really uncomfortable.  

            I have such appreciation for the kindness of my travel guides and friends who assisted (and continue to assist) along this journey.  I value the wanderluster in me who opted this time to get out of my Naples hotel room and head to Pompeii to walk through the ruins.  There’s such gratitude for being safe, interacting with friendly people, and having the luxury of time to do this.  Whenever you may be going through difficulties in your travels, after getting out a little complaining, pause and reframe.  It’s all part of the journey.  

Being a Creative Vs. Living Creatively

20 Jul 2023 Leave a comment

by Dr. Tricia Wolanin in Uncategorized Tags: , , , , ,

“Art is not what you see, but what you make others see.” Edgar Degas 

I’m a trained creativity coach, I help people with their creative projects in meeting their deadlines, offering accountability, or just have it be part of their daily lives again. Even though I view my life as creative, I sometimes have difficulty viewing myself as a creative.  

            Although I journal daily, does that make me a writer?  I’ve written one book, numerous blogs, been featured in articles, have a literary agent, and had an article published in the Washington Post this year.  Even after all this, it’s been difficult to call myself a writer.  But I finally do. 

            But there are other forms of creativity I dabble in, but I do not think much of them.  I have a dslr camera I barely use, but I do take numerous photos on my phone.  Last year, I even won a photography contest with the school where I was taking French classes. I won two tickets to a film screening of the Champs Elysees Film Festival. Yet, I minimized it, because the subject in front of me was stunning.

            My brother is more of the photographer, with the expensive camera, an eye for detail, editing, and redefining his work.  He talks theory of art when framing a photo.  While I value this, the advice doesn’t stay in my head, when I want to quickly snap a shot.  

            Regardless of this, I sometimes still enter a competition here or there.  Few, but for the fun of it.  Yesterday I received word that although I didn’t win the contest, one of my photographs will be on public display in Malaga for one month.  This is two competitions I have entered and been recognized, and perhaps I can finally start to call myself an artist, a creative.

            So often we think we need permission or validation to give ourself a title, but why?  We can give that to ourselves, regardless of what another thinks.  I’ve met people who introduce themselves with their side hustle versus what they do that pays the bills. They are leaning into their new reality, by creating a new narrative.  Perhaps I can do that too.

            Or I can follow the advice of Mark Nepo

“I started out wanting to write great poems, then wanting to discover true poems. Now, I want to be the poem.”— Mark Nepo

            And so I offer those words of advice to you this week.  Instead of trying to be an identity or label, be the essence versus the product. Be the verb.  Live into that which you are longing to be called.  Joy and delight is found in the being versus completing.

Clothes Make the Women

16 Jul 2023 Leave a comment

by Dr. Tricia Wolanin in Uncategorized

“Don’t be into trends. Don’t make fashion own you, but you decide what you are, what you want to express by the way you dress and the way to live.” —Gianni Versace

The other day when reading Joe Dispenza’s book Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself, I had a revelation.  The book explores parts of the Law of Attraction, and aspects of the applicability of Quantum Theory.  I realized I had created my reality.  In 2018, I decided for one year I would only wear clothes that were in the style of Vintage, French, or Spanish.  I did this for the fun of it.  In some ways I was creating a capsule wardrobe but without the formality of it.  It was simply for the joy of it and to explore another facet of my creativity visually.

It wasn’t until 2023 that I realized I created my reality.

I lived one year in France and I currently am living in Spain.  I was a walking vision board, without planning it.  I dressed into my reality.  Upon realizing the power of wardrobe, I realized I was going to do this with intention.  And for this year, my new emphasis will be in the realm of two styles.

  1. Bobo

Bobo-or as the French like to call it Bohemian Bougeouise.  This was coined as a term I heard when I lived in Paris, that represented liberal individuals who were intellectual.  It’s a yuppie world that meets Bohemian. To read about the creation of this years ago, check this article out where it was first discussed https://www.nytimes.com/2000/10/14/news/in-france-a-new-class-reinvents-the-good-life-bobo-style-has-it-both.html

2. Abundance

I am going to exude Abundance in the realm of Hindu goddess Lakshmi (or even the goddess Fortuna).  This includes bright and joyful colors that offer a tropical goddess vibe.  Last month, I attended an energy psychology conference.  A woman complimented me on this outfit I was wearing and said I looked like abundance.  I took the compliment, and now am running with it.  

I may not be dressing into a particular region of the world, but a mindset and philosophy.  Now my focus is turned to crafting my reality.  In addition to offering an outlet for one’s creative display of imagination, it can assist with self-control.  I noticed it assists with discerning one’s purchases when shopping the sales, which at the moment is 50% is more in Malaga.    Having a theme offers something to aspire to, even when we don’t have the motivation or energy to think about our wardrobe.  For me, this was exemplified this past week.  On the most recent extremely hot days I attend Spanish class with no air conditioning, instead of just thinking of what I can wear that I will stay the coolest in, I think “how can I bobo this outfit?”  It serves as an inspiration and effort into my daily life and not just for the big event moments. 

Years ago, when shopping at a vintage store, I tried on a fascinator (fancy hair piece, people wore in the 40’s and 50s).  I said to myself in the mirror, “It’s cute, but I have nowhere special to where it to.”  The lovely store clerk looked at me and said in her 50’s dress, “everyday is special.”  

Yes clothes and our wardrobe seems trivial.  There are so many other things to worry about in our lives and the world.  But with a tiny bit of effort and intention, we can bring into our lives that which we dress.  


“The joy of dressing is an art.” —John Galliano

Always More To See

09 Jul 2023 Leave a comment

by Dr. Tricia Wolanin in Uncategorized Tags: , , ,

 WE TRAVEL NOT TO ESCAPE LIFE, BUT FOR LIFE NOT TO ESCAPE US. – ANONYMOUS

There’s a realization recently that my time in Europe may come to an end this year.  I’ve been living overseas for 10 years, 8 ½ in England, 1 in France, and ½ in Spain.  And the inevitable finality of it makes me realize there are things I want to do before I leave.

Immediate bucket lists came in my head:

-A trip to Zurich so I can squeeze in Lichtenstein

-An all out trip to the UAE (and touchdown on 8 territories)

-Flying to Athens so I can pilgrimage to where the Oracle of Delphi was, and hit up two other territories of Cyprus I haven’t been to. 

-Go to Northern Ireland and then explore Jersey

-What about Tunisia and Corsica? 

As an aspiring future member of the Travel Century Club, I want to hit up as many countries as possible.  But there is a realization that all may not be feasible, at least with the remaining moments to have.  I still have friends visiting and a trip planned in several weeks to Italy to explore Lampedusa and San Marino.  

Breathe Tricia.

It’s okay to still have places you want to go or return to in the European vicinity.  You don’t have to do it all now.  I can always come back.  It’s okay if I don’t see everything right now.  Perhaps it’s best to leave when you still desire more. 

Years ago I had a conversation with a fellow psychologist from Ireland at an Adlerian conference in Malta.  At the time, I was in my 20s, she was a decade older than me.  She offered me this advice, “These countries will always be here.  My goal is to travel to one country each year.  If I live until my 80s, that’s still 50 countries.”  This older and wiser woman told me this as I was backpacking Europe, and had visited 15 countries in one summer. It was overwhelming, but exhilarating.

At times like this, when I feel my time in scarce, I need to remind myself that one’s life can be abundant.  I have time.   Why rush when I can luxuriate in the time that remains?

I am unclear of the exact amount of time I have left.  If I can only do Zurich, it’s not just to check off Lichtenstein.  But with research, I have found that closeby I can visit the home of psychoanalyst Carl Jung.  I can pilgrimage to another Black Madonna that is one hour from Zurich, that Jung had written about.  I could have a leisurely lunch in Lucerne. 

I will make most of the time in Europe and will live experiences versus simply checking boxes off a list.  I hope wherever you are reading this, you can experience some time affluence with your summer.