It Only Takes A Smile

“…the whole of Paris is a vast university of Art, Literature and Music…it is worth anyone’s while to dally here for years. Paris is a seminar, a post-graduate course in Everything.”-James Thurber

         The market street of Rue Cler is petit, cute, and quintessentially Parisian.  It has all the shops you need in one space, but not under the roof of a supermarket.  Because it has such charm, it’s highly frequented by tourists.  As I hear American accents, part of me recognizes they are from my homeland.  But am I American?  I’ve lived away from America for nearly 9 years, and in addition to that 2 of my adult years were in Hawaii (not the mainland).  

         I stood in line for a coffee today, and as I did, there was an American who spoke Franglaise.  The barista opted to speak to her in English.  The American then said, “merci beaucoup, thank you.”  Both phrases to ensure the staff member understood her.  Yet when I ordered in French, I didn’t speak one word in English.  She responded by speaking to me in French.  Perhaps I am fitting in a tiny bit more than I thought.  Maybe my French is better, or at least I’m attempting to speak French in full sentences or I appear to fit in more?  

         I can’t help but ponder my identity several months into my year here.  It’s more than the exterior of language.  How American am I in my values?  How I represent myself to the world? How I engage with others.  It’s quite interesting the longer one is away from one’s home country, one begins to understand it more because it’s viewed and questioned from numerous angles.  I can also appreciate aspects of it that I have taken for granted, each time I return home, such as closet space, convenience, sense of humor, idioms, and the fact I can understand everything that is being said.

         The shock values is heightened with each trip back to America over the years, and then my eventual return to wherever I am living at the moment.  Where is home?  What resonates with me?  How do I want to live my life?  I will continue to ponder these questions over lattes the next several months…

Today, I was watching my two dogs, after I gave them dental bones.  These two dogs love one another and will cuddle all the time.  But when food is involved, it seems their personalities shift to “to each their own.”  These dental bones can take a long time to chew and are weekly rewards.  But each time I give them to the dogs, they approach the situation differently.

Puzo, the English Bulldog, is in his own world.  His focus solely is on the bone entering his mouth and nothing else.  Bella , the pug chihuahua mix, simply watches him and growls.  She is focused on the future, knows he will finish his first, and then go for hers.  Her preoccupation on him taking her bone, keeps her from enjoying the moment.  Puzo finishes his bone, and I am the one who then takes away Bella’s, as a fight will inevitably ensue.  

It led me to ponder, who are we when pleasure enters our lives?

Are we like Puzo, who lives in the moment and enjoys it for what it is? 

Or are we like Bella, limiting our pleasure, because we know the moment will end? 

How have you responded but also how do you want to respond?  You have a choice on how you want to enjoy your own metaphorical dental bone!

Enjoy present pleasures in such a way as not to injure future ones.- Seneca

         This past week my friends and I hosted our own vision board party.  The last time we did this together as a group, with the exact same attendees was nine years ago.  Vision boarding is an annual event for me, whether I am teaching a class on it, or completing it solo.  There’s magic to setting our goals for the year with communal intention.

         I knew this would be an all day event.  When I teach workshops for this purpose, they generally lasts 90 minutes.  It’s never enough time.  When you do this project with loved ones, time is lost.  For us, we wanted to make it extra festive.  We added yoga and delicious takeout cuisine.  Therefore our vision board event turned into a 11 hour event. 

         Verbalizing our goals aloud in a group is a form of accountability.  We are not just vowing to ourselves what we want to achieve, we are sharing it in a group.  When we do this, search for images that symbolize our desires, and note to others what it is we are seeking, others in the group offer ways they can assist in finding you what you need.   The universe can assist us in manifesting what we want.  But we must be intentional and focused.  

         The other thing with vision boards is it isn’t magic.  Yes, what we put on these poster boards can come true, but there’s a missing component.  We need to take action.  Each day we need to narrow our eyes to what it is that we desire and work towards inching closer to it.  Our friends can continue to serve as accountability partners after the vision board is completed.  We can continue to check in on each other’s progress, and steps that need to be taken for this to manifest in our lives.  If we do not achieve what is on board, we must also wonder is it something we actually wanted in the first place?  Or is it simply a carry over from last year’s goals?  Goals need to be refreshed and decluttered annually.  If not, they will remain take away leftovers forgotten about and tucked away in the back of your refrigerator.  Is it still okay to eat?  Are they moldy and need to be thrown away?  Ask yourself this each year as you revisit this vision board process.