Ode to Bella

My canine companion is turning 16 years old this month.  Often after people ask me about her breed and name, I am quick to also respond with her age.  As I mouth the words 16, often people are impressed.  They may share how old their dogs are, or if they had an elder dog, share stories of the age their dogs lived to.  And there’s a moment of connection, we bond over being parents of elderly dogs.

Over the past 2 ½ years, after Puzo (my English Bulldog) died of 15 years, Bella had a difficult time adjusting.  Her whole time in this world included him being in it.  It was then she began howling if I left the room, because she was alone with no one in her pack.  At the time we were living in Paris, and as we both grieved his loss, we would walk two long blocks to the Eiffel Tower to seek comfort in the park and the spectacular beauty of this site.

She began going with me more on first dates, time with friends, mini vacations.  We drove from France to Spain, as she sat in my mother’s lap for the entire 17 hour trip.  Over time, her age began showing, she no longer could jump on the couch as she used to.  She would tire on our walks, and so I would carry her. People ask me often why not take a stroller, but I think she enjoys lying like a baby in my arms, half asleep, taking in the sun.

Since moving back to America this year, Bella has surprised me. She has learned to swim, learned to play a new game with treats, and taken her first selfie.  Who says you can’t teach an old dog new tricks? Bella is proof.

(Bella’s First Selfie)

This week, I had leftovers from a New Years Eve meal: Filet Mignon.  She devoured pieces of it over a span of three days.  Today, my friend and I went to the fancy Rosewood Miramar in Montecito.  I served Bella bits of cerviche. Yes, she is spoiled, but doesn’t a 16 year old deserve this?

Two women visiting from out of state chatted with us as we left the outdoor restaurant.  They noticed the satisfaction in Bella’s face.  My friend was quick to offer that Bella has had a good life, the best life.  And I couldn’t agree more.  16 years ago I found her stray in Santa Barbara county, and she joined me as we moved to Hawaii, LA, England, Paris, Spain, and back to California.  People often ask where did she enjoy the best, but where she loves most I realize is anywhere that I am with more time off, and moments to sleep in the sun. 

With that I offer a Cheers to Bella- my 16 year old chug (or puguaua) bundle of joy. And if you have a dog too, cheers to your companion and witness to the journey of your life

Paying Attention

I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams. -William Butler Yeats

            This morning, while taking out my dog for her morning walk, I stepped on a snail.  This was not on purpose. I am usually so careful of where I am stepping.  It’s at this early hour where I watch the snails go from the grassy area over the sidewalk to the bushes.  This is the only time of day I observe them in my neighborhood inching around.  But today I wasn’t paying attention to where my feet were walking and I heard a crunch.  Automatically I felt quite bad, how was I not more mindful at this moment? Where was my head?

            Instead of ruminating on what I didn’t do, I could focus on what I can do for the future: PAY ATTENTION.

            I also began to think of the metaphor of treading softly.  How often do we hurt others with unkind words or a lack of support in people following their dreams or goals? Our one disapproving comment could stick with them.  A person told me yesterday, how the comment “there are no stupid questions” he once believed this, but once when he asked a question in a setting and the person answering belittled him and reminded him this was a stupid question.  “It only was once, but it stuck with me.”  This sheltered this person’s sense of curiosity or ability to trust others, for fear they will be judged. 

            How often do we do this to ourselves as well? Make negative statements to ourselves, show a disregard and negativity to our own aspirational pursuits.  We are harming our own dreams.

            Therefore, pay attention to the words you express towards yourself or others, “tread softly because you tread on my dreams.”

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