“Paris, I believe, is a man in his twenties in love with an older woman.”
― John Berger
I am headed to the states for the third time today since living in Paris. It’s been six months since I have moved here, and everytime I leave I can’t help but reflect on what my experience has been like.
What I have learned in France so far….
1.People have opinions of your dogs : are they healthy enough, where they should go to the bathroom, how long should they live, should they walk more, who to play with ?
2.Women don’t wear shorts, sweats, or yoga pants. Floral dresses and skirts seem to be preferred. Until 2013, it was illegal for 200 years for women to wear pants. It sounds preposterous, but I found this out reading the Bonjour Effect. Women were forbidden to wear pants to keep them from dressing as men and going into the workforce.
3.The double kiss on the cheek is the real deal.
4.Life does feel like a scene from the Disney cartoon Beauty and the Beast, where one must greet everyone with a bonjour. To avoid doing so is rude. It’s best to comply.
5.Many Parisians do not drive or have a need for a driver’s license.
6.Most people speak English, particularly the younger generation. Those fifty and over years old, I have learned to not expect this. If you don’t speak French, and find yourself in conversation with someone who solely speaks French, you can basically figure it out. Guestimate it.
7.Paris is full of diversity and interracial relationships, which has been beautiful to witness.
8.Apartments are small, anything over 400 sqare feet is killing it with space ! We all seem to partake in tiny home living here I’ve learned to survive in 290 square feet, between me, my English bulldog, and my chug. I’ve even hosted a guest for a month . .
9.Parisians are quiet on public transportation. If they talk on the phone, it’s a whisper, the dogs don’t bark, and even the children are behaved. This becomes apparent when other Americans get on a metro.
10.Paris seems to be the quintissential American European dream. There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t hear an American accent (which isn’t my own).
11.If you try to speak French, they may speak back to you in French. Or they may find it amusing, and want to minimize your embarassing accent, and just respond to you in English.
12.There are over 130 museums in Paris, to appear cultured, one must attend an exhibit at least once a month.
13.The French dress simply, but classy. One doesn’t find much bright colors, and due to minimal closet space, they make the most of what you have. A camel winter coat, military green trench coat, and simple white sneakers go a long way.
14.Parisians love their parks. Apartments are small, but the parks (in addition to the cafes) seem to be where locals extend their living rooms for picnics, celebrations, or even dates.
15.Everyone drinks tap water. Je voudrais un carafe d’eau s’il vous plait.
16.There’s no guilt over the pleasures in life, whether this is gluten, calories, wine, or sex. Joie de vivre is real. Who needs a gym when you walk everywhere ?
17.Parisians are serious about their food and desserts. Everyone has an opinion, and generally it’s « not bad. » Compliments are infrequent for cuisine.
18.You can feel the creativity, history, and dreams as you walk the streets and boulevards of Paris. All who inspired by it once haunted the same pathways as you, and if you observe and listen closely, you may absorb the Paris effect as well.
19.Many Parisians long to explore other parts of the world too, and dream of living in other places. It’s universal to desire what we don’t have. They have a curious interest towards the American Western dream, cowboys, land, and the unknown.
20. There’s a mystery to the city, in trying to define it. How does one do that ? A flaneur is someone who walks around not doing anything in particular but watching people and society, according to the Cambridge Dictionary. And I feel one can spend a lifetime doing this in Paris, trying to absorb the wisdom and creativity that are embedded in the historical streets of the 20 arrondistments.
And so I will continue to explore more of the complexities of Paris. I am an outsider looking in, roaming the streets, wondering if I will ever be an insider…
It Only Takes A Smile 